Happiness is being comfortable in your own skin, including all the bruises and scars from past mistakes. Happiness is sharing your bliss like fairy dust. Happiness is changing the things that you can and accepting what you can’t. Happiness is forgiving others, and especially forgiving yourself. Happiness is knowing that you’re more than enough…
I broke myself into a million pieces for the hate I tried to convince myself I felt for you. I broke myself until the fire turned to smog. And through the fog I saw the mess I had become. And the truth between the ashes was that hate for you was not what I felt. I hated who you had made me become.
Maybe in the short term, you’re just what I needed to smile again. I’ll be grateful for your presence in my life either way. You were never perfect and neither was I. But you at least reminded me that I didn’t have to be. So I thank you in words you’ll likely never see.
Oh my, the places that we’ve been. I smile looking at my shoe rack imagining the journey I’ve had as nostalgia whispers to me softly. Then I realize how much farther I have yet to go and make a necessary decision: Today I buy new shoes.
So it kills me that I could get this far without you and still turn my head back to look at what once was. I know there’s nothing there. I know the person I loved is so far gone no road could ever lead me to him. And yet, I miss you.